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A Letter to My Partnered Self, From My Single Self

I wrote this letter a couple of years ago in strength after a tough breakup. I was connected with realizations about my usual patterns and what parts of myself I gave away when I was in a relationship. I was on a different side of love than usual and took these notes to remind myself of what I could see. I wanted to remember these lessons when I was in a relationship to keep a balance of nurturing myself to allow my future partnership to flourish on greater levels, no matter how "different" I may feel.

I just found this letter again and see I can heed my own advice here more... However, I found these notes very refreshing and would love to share them with you.

Here is the letter:

Always have:

· A 10 minute walk to self - connect with nature

· Own relations with everyone

· A good friend to confide in and seek council from

· Savings available, my own car, and bath supplies (for a sanctuary retreat when needed)

· My own creative projects

Be independent and strong. Be my own source of energy and vibrance.

Know that love is limitless. Don't invest in needing it from anyone at all. Feel the beauty of allowing those you love to love and receive love from others. Enjoy it.

Add to the relationship. Don’t need it or seek fulfillment from it.

Love myself first so that my well is always full and has plenty to spare.

Move forward my self. Don’t wait on others, yet offer to include them.

Once I commit to a relationship, agree to love everything about them – even their faults. Yes, love and accept their “faults” - even when annoyed with them.

When hurt, always go to self first. Process emotions, come to understanding, then communicate. Get clarity and compassion first.

Consider my partners feelings above others (except for mine and kids).

Agree that kids come first. They are priority. Agree and commit to them beyond ourselves – even if our relationship has ended.

Recognize when someone is no longer beneficial. Express your emotions before it gets to that point. Make changes as necessary.

And always remember... a relationship is never untouchable. Appreciate and nurture it. Keep it mutually beneficial for best results.

I hope these notes have sparked some insight for you. :)

Danielle Marie Crume
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Comments

  1. Luscious Deals ReviewsAugust 17, 2009 at 12:28 AM

    this is a wonderful post and so glad that you posted this. It's given me alot to ponder about in my marriage and life. Thanks so much for this..Have a wonderful week!

    ReplyDelete

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